Interview with Rob

I interviewed Rob near the beginning of

Nobody's Hero Part 1

Age: 21 yrs

What are your hobbies? Do you have any talents?

Erm, riding my bike, cycling, go-karting,....... Spending time with Imi?....
I guess I enjoy daring her to do things and vice versa.
Does wave dodging count as a hobby?? I also love drawing, whether it is a talent, the jury is currently out...
Though I am thinking of taking a real life art class...
Does organising and creating drinking games count as a talent?? Fixing anything with an engine...

What is your favourite music?

I don’t really have a type, I just like music! I’m into hardcore stuff you know, like Lional Ritchie, Tina arena, and of course Celine Dion! Imi got me into liking capercaillie.
They were a bit annoying at first but they grow on you till you cant live without it.
I love the Corrs, Shakira, Westlife, and Sixpence none the richer. They aren't chick music!

What is your favourite colour?

Blue! I’m blue daba dee daba doo!!!!!!

Where do you live now, and with whom?

I live in Newcastle. I still live at home with my parents and my annoying little Sis. My brothers have moved out.
Yeah, I know I should move out.

Are you optimistic or pessimistic?

Optimistic! My glass is overflowing, as long as its filled with alcohol!

What is your dream bike?

That’s a hard one! I keep changing my mind because there is so many great bikes!!
My dream bike has to be fast, reliable, comfort riding position, did I say fast???
Ideally above 1000cc. Imi wants me to get a Kawasaki ZZR1200. I guess Imi will want it to have a comfortable pillion seat.
But I guess until I can get a beast we're stuck with my faithful Buzby.

Do you believe in the existence of soul mates and/or true love?

I guess I believe in soulmates, I've kind of met mine if that's what you want to call it, I have no idea what to classify it as.
True Love?? I've never been in love but I think it is real.
Though if it is, I doubt anyone would fall in love with a hopeless case like me.

Who has had the most influence on you?

I'd have to say Imi, though don't tell her I said that!

Who would you turn to if you were in desperate need of help?

Imi, of course. I've turned to her on many occasions, I guess there is also Charlie. I don't really trust anyone else!

What is your greatest regret so far, why?

Not beating the crap out of that waste of space, Jacob.....

Have you been in trouble with the police or have a criminal record?

Does being drunk in charge of a pushbike count??

No I don't have a criminal record but have been caught speeding once....
but I have promised to be good, or be too fast that I don't get caught.

Relationships? Do you have anyone special in your life? You seem to talk about Imi a lot!

Relationship… Nah, I’ve had a couple of girlfriends over the years but they never last.
If I’m honest I think I sabotage them! I don't think anyone should have to be stuck with me and end up with my baggage…..
Yeah I guess I talk about her a lot, she is kinda special.

What would your dream girl be like?

Has to like bikes! Blonde... I love Blondes....
I guess if I’m to answer seriously I guess someone who could calm me a little.

Someone who would be there for me 100%, and someone who understands me, and able to put up with me,
I know I can be hard work!

Tell me more about your relationship with Imogen?

We became friends in college, I found myself drawn to her, no idea why.
Ever since I've kind of ended up looking after her, and I do enjoy winding her up! Someone needs to save her from herself... and Jacob. She's a good distraction and has kind of given me some purpose in life.

She really is fragile behind that armour she wears. We have a kind of chemistry. I guess I do love her......
but not in the traditional way. She gets me in ways no one else does.

Do you believe in anything? Do you have a faith?

I don't know! My family are Methodists so I get dragged to church quite a lot so have been brought up that way
but i find too many 'Christians' to be fake and find church boring.
I just go to keep the peace. If you'd asked me before Imi I would have said no.

Imi took me to her church which had a rock band, and we went to some Christian event with a guy swallowing razor blades... I also have known Matt from her band for quite a while.
He's cool and genuine though think he's not too impressed with me and Imi getting close.

Through them I've met some genuine people but I'm still not 100% sure whether there is anything in it,
or if its just a load of smoke and mirrors! I guess I'm just hedging my bets, best to believe and live a good life
and if there is a heaven I'm in! Though there better be bikes in heaven...
Imi believes there is and has imagined Jesus riding out of the gates of heaven on a Harley!
Talking about heaven have you heard the joke about the 4 men?
4 men appear simultaneously in front of peter. He then proceeded to ask the first man how he died.

1st man
"I was doing gardening work for a landscaping company when all of a sudden a man falls from a balcony.
I go to help him but then a wardrobe falls on my head and now I am here."
St peter sends him through the gates.

The 2nd man says
"I suspected my wife to be cheating on me so I went home early and saw a man with my wife.
I grabbed him and threw him off my balcony. I still felt like I didn't commit a sufficient amount of pain so I grabbed the closest wardrobe and threw it off the ledge.
I felt this pain in my heart, probably a heart attack and now I am here."
St peter hesitated but then felt sorry for the poor man so let him go into heaven."

3rd man
"I was on gumtree and saw this woman was selling her speakers so I went to her house. Next thing I know is a man throws me off his balcony. I hit the ground and a man comes to see if I am okay. Next thing you know this wardrobe comes down and kills us both."

Peter sends him though the gates.
There was only one man remaining, so Peter asked him how he died.
He said " I was having sex with this chick. We hear a knock at the door and she tells me to hide in a wardrobe by the balcony..... And I somehow ended up here!"

Peter decides that guy had some serious bad luck and sends him to heaven!

What are your dreams and goals for the future?

Dreams..... I always wanted to be a professional rider but that aint going to happen!! As for goals... Apart from 'fixing' Imogen... I’ve no idea! I’m just living for today! Life is short.
I don’t like to plan ahead cause I’m not promised the future everyone else is.
I’m on borrowed time so I’m going to live life fast & furious! Apart from art, maybe become a famous racing driver!

Why do you say you’re on borrowed time?

I have problems with my kidneys, but its OK when the time comes Imi is going to give me one of hers!